**This is a satirical article... at a discount price**

It seems like Dollar General stores are popping up everywhere. But after some investigative efforts, we sadly have been able to locate five places in Michigan that actually don't have a place to get a 20 pack of tube socks.

Although, by the time you are done reading this article, stores likely will have already popped up in these spots.

1. Mackinac Island

Mackinac Island (Google Satellite Image)

Oh fudge...

Mackinac Island has a lot of places to buy things, but it doesn't have a place to buy Party Wacky Silly String. You can walk, bike or ride a horse across the whole island but, just like automobiles, you won't find a Dollar General among some of Michigan's oldest history. Might as well get back on the ferry.

2. The former site of the Pontiac Silverdome

Pontiac Silverdome (Google Satellite Image)

They really dropped the ball here (kinda like the Detroit Lions do)

The place where Lions fans watched their team lose before they moved to the new place where they watch their team lose is completely void of a spot to pick up a 12 pack of Eveready Gold AA batteries. Talk about a "losing culture".

3. Soo Locks

Soo Locks (Google Satellite Image)

Are you getting that sinking feeling?

All those ships and sites to tour, but not even remotely an option to purchase one of many assorted H2O GO! Inflatable Junior Boats for kids on your last stop north before Canada. Looks like this ship has sailed.

4. Isle Royale National Park

Isle Royale National Park (Google Satellite Image)

Maybe this is why the wolves won't stick around.

Surrounded by Lake Superior, this is a beautiful isolated place for adventure on the land and in the water. What it isn't? A place to purchase an As Seen On TV Egglettes Egg Poaching Cup (was $10, now $5). Hard pass.

5. Huron National Forest

Huron National Forest (Google Satellite Image)

Oh deer...

Hundreds upon hundreds of miles of vast forestland. It's a hunter's dream. But you know what the nightmare is? Trying to find a Comfort Bay Shower Caddy or a Comfort Bay Soap Dish With Suction Cups here. Pffft.... Wake me up when hunting season is over.

Before you hashtag #NotPureMichigan, did we miss anything? What other places in Michigan are out of luck when it comes to finding a TrueLiving Mini Garden Gnome Set 5 Piece? Let us know in the Facebook comments.