Study Says These Are Michigan’s 10 Trashiest Cities
From the state that brought you the GOAT in white trash history, Kid Rock, Michigan is a wonderful place to prop up your home on cinderblocks and soak in the chaos from your back porch with a Marlboro in one hand and a Busch Light in the other.
Okay, in all seriousness, as someone who lived in Alabama for 25 years and in some seriously trashy neighborhoods, I'll tell you from my experience, Michigan is pretty far from the trashiest places I've ever been. Sure, we've got some pretty sketchy places on our map, but it can always be worse, especially when you look south.
I mean, what further example need I provide than acknowledging the lord and savior of white trash, Kid Rock, is fake white trash? In case you didn't know, his family was loaded long before he was screaming his name into a microphone or shooting cases of Bud Light.
Still, where there is an opportunity to be trashy, there will be those who dwell there. It doesn't mean you're a bad person if you live in these cities. Heck, I'm wondering just how accurate this list is myself.
You didn't think I was going to call you guys trashy, did you? Nope, this is all from a list made by Road Snacks, which used a variety of metrics to determine where the trashiest places are, such as high school dropout rates, drug use, assault crime rates and other, sillier metrics such as bowling alley populations.
So kick back on your hand-me-down couch, peek through the sheet hanging over the one-pane window to make sure you aren't missing a trailer park brawl, understand that this is all a joke anyway, and point and laugh at the "trashiest" cities in all of Michigan.