America Celebrates Soldiers for Memorial Day… Meanwhile Lilly Allen gets Topless and Dances in Spanx

I gotta report the important stuff.. you know!?!

This is such a trainwreck... and I CAN'T STOP WATCHING! I mean, I'm sure you've seen my weird twerk upside down videos in the studio, but at least I keep my clothes on!

Spankx dancing just freaks me out now! Maybe I'll buy some spanx and have a twerk off with Lilly Allen in them!... or maybe I won't and just say I did.